Migraines, My painting, saying goodbye... 7 weeks 6 days post op

Arggg... for the love... The migraine curse is back with a vengeance. 4 days in a row. I have required the prescription Maxalt to kill the brain thumping. I only take it when Im totally desperate. I had hoped that the jaw surgery might relieve this pesky predator, but it seems to have failed.  I do clench my teeth at night, and even throughout the day. Perhaps once the orthodontics are completed I will find relief. My surgeon did comment that jaw joint pressure lasts for a while post surgery. My ability to chew is getting slightly better. but the advancement of the upper jaw seems to have brought my cheeks in closer contact to my teeth. I have to be careful when chewing or I bite into the cheeks ouch.. The orthodontist will be narrowing my upper teeth very soon this may help create more room inside my mouth full of teeth. 

I've had a very busy week, good and bad have knocked on the door. I have added pictures below to chronicle my last couple of days. I have been so grateful that I have documented this process. As I look back on older postings, I know that I would have never remembered all of my moments. What a gift!!


2 of my besties at a summer solstice celebration. Oh what fun we had. 
This is a story.. The photo is the Swilcan bridge. The 18th hole at St. Andrews golf course in Scotland. A famous landscape that has been graced by the worlds finest golfers. In July of 1997,  John and I were dating, and we went to Scotland to see the British Open held at (Troon) that year.  We stopped at this golf course, and it was raining sideways. I was freezing, bone chilling cold and John asked me to walk over to this monument with him. I had to say no. I was frozen solid and miserable. What I didn't know then was that he had plans to propose on this bridge. I felt badly for years once I knew, but as time went on, I realized that this bridge was the beginning of the story and a main character. John did propose on that trip but it was in Belfast Ireland, on the haypenny bridge at the 3rd lampost over the liffy river. My Dad is an artist and paints with Oil. When I was visiting with my kids a couple of weeks ago, I asked him to help me paint this photo for John as a fathers day gift. His eyebrows scrunched together and he felt overwhelmed by the detail and wasn't sure. Eventually he gave up and told me it was to difficult.  I was disappointed, but not ready to give up. I decided what the hell, Im a jewelry artist, it's in my blood Im sure I can figure this out on my own.  Now please know that I have had no formal art training and so if any of you happen to be accomplished artists, be gentle in your critique. I broke every rule Im sure, but after all I am a rule breaker, and in the process managed to paint this 18th hole at St. Andrews and present it to John for fathers day. 
This is my first painted and framed work. I didn't use a technique, I just used my intuition to put it together. He loved it, and it may not be perfect, but Im proud anyway. Sometimes breaking the rules pays off!!

Sydnie giving John her gift. Happy Fathers Day to the best Dad around!


And the sad... This is my beautiful cousin Shauna. She lived for 9 years with terminal cancer. Her spirit is now free. Only 34 years old, but a life lived to the fullest each day. I will remember her as a survivor and an optimist. She has a miracle daughter who came to her during the early years of her diagnosis. Her body needed to rest, she made every minute important. You will be missed sweet girl, but I know from the deepest place inside my heart, that you are not gone. I know you will be around loving those who miss you so much.  I hope to make the most out of my moments, and appreciate always the abundance and love that surrounds me every single day. This jaw surgery journey has been so much more than a physical experience for me. I have learned deeper lessons as I have struggled through the days that required raw survival. I know that there is always a great lesson to learn in what may seem like the saddest and hardest times. Knowing this for sure, I honor with deepest gratitude, every single difficulty and impossibility that has graced my path. I didn't come to be a viking warrior by sun bathing, It takes a dark night of the soul experience to rise from the ash as a phoenix and soar from above with new perspective and growth. Thank you for teaching us how to live, even when you didn't feel like it. Thank you for teaching courage, by never giving up. You have a legacy that will not be soon forgotten. Sending you the deepest love and gratitude. I love you!

3 comments:

  1. Ah, sorry for your loss, Tresa. Very sad.

    Awesome painting! Glad he loved it!

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  2. Hi, Tresa!

    First, my condolences to your family....
    Your picture turned out beautifully; such a thoughtful gift. Have you ever considered Botox for migraines?? Not suggesting that you should, per se. Just throwing it out there, because I had a doc recommend it to me years ago when I was suffering from frequent, chronic migraines. Just a thought...

    You have beautiful family and lots of things to be happy about; I'm sure that must help the healing process go quicker! :-)

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  3. oh gosh Tresa, this post made me cry! I'm so sorry about your cousin, she sounds like an amazing person and I bet you miss her so much.
    I love the painting! It's great, and I make jewellry too, it's so much fun hey:)
    your smile is so beautiful, you look better and better with each post! I have been looking at your blog for ages, and kept meaning to comment, It's great:) xoxox

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